And you're damned right I am worthy of being touched like a King upon request.

I grew up gay in suburban North Texas, knowing the entire time since I was 2 that men turned me on, and that I had better keep my mouth shut about it.

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I had a non-affectionate family and extended family, and I never dated girls because I was terrified that they would immediately know and that I would be "outed."

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I lived through more extensive spinal surgery at age 16 than the one I just had.

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I lived through life-threatening depression during my 20's that made working while going to college take 10 1/2 years to complete.

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I lived through working two jobs from November 1993 to September 1999, seven days per week, during the period when my mom had a kidney transplant and then until I moved out of her house after she became self-sufficient again.

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I lived through moving across the country for a job that promised enough to pay the debts incurred during that period, only to find all my income gobbled up by rent in San Francisco.

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I lived through having 11 adresses in 9 years since I got to California, trying to find the right job and right place to live.

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I lived through having my mother almost snatched up from me in an instant in an auto accident, after having devoted my entire young adulthood to her health.

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I lived through several years of debilitating pain until I found a doctor who would listen to me, which resulted in my recent surgery.

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I lived through ALL of it single and alone, and still maintained my most decent, honest, caring, loyal, devoted, and loving character traits during it ALL.

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I deserve to live naked, to be worshipped with hands and tongues, and to be waited on like a King should I so desire. For to love me is to have a loyal, devoted friend who will walk through fire for you for the rest of your life.

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At the very least, I deserve to finally be free to give and to receive affection from those who claim to love me, something I had never experienced before I moved to California and before I finally learned how to love myself. Loving myself means that I understand that Love is what sustains us, and without it, we are nothing. Love takes nothing and no one for granted, and is completely committed to the well-being of all involved. And touch (with or without sexuality) is the most basic, fundamental physical expression of Love. I involuntarily went without it for 40+ years - far longer than anyone I know ever thought about going without touch. I can't and won't do it anymore. I will not rest until I have the basic daily minimum requirement of touch that it takes to sustain life.

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Why do you think you are going to Gay Pride on Sunday? To celebrate the ability to wear pink and twirl flags if you want? No! The celebration is because we are fighting for equal rights to be able to FUCK and TOUCH and LOVE who we please. So don't come in my house and tell me that "people do not touch," and that my need for touch is abnormal. That is a LIE. Try to find no couples walking arm-in-arm, or kissing - try not to touch your spouse and every friend you see - I dare you! You won't be able to because TOUCH is the basic primary drive of creation itself at work.