Getting back to Basics.

That my purity of heart has been contaminated by life and by society is the reason I am so unhappy on earth. I have always been upset by people's treatment of each other. It has always upset me that there are humans who are denied basic needs of food, clothing, shelter, education, medical care, and love. It has always upset me that I am not accepted as the pure-hearted being that I am not treated accordingly (I am thinking of social and dating situations, where image is everything). Like everyone else, I grew up socialized to believe that I wanted to find an attractive partner, and that his personality and heart were to be considered only after the assessment of his appearance.

But I have learned to not be a participant in that game and to not routinely refuse to date or socialize with other individuals based upon the assertion of my preferences regarding how I would like my partner to appear physically, because I understand all too well what it is like to be ostracized and marginalized based upon physical characteristics. How, then, could I live with myself for perpetuating that painful game by playing it? I could not live with myself if I were found guilty of mistreating anyone based upon any level of physical attraction or non-attraction to them, especially since I am well aware of how it feels to be on the other side of that scenario.

My disdain for people's poor treatment of each other made the contrast between my usual experience and my experience during the past two years much more clear, and therefore the experience much more enjoyable than it might have otherwise been - a time when I was surrounded by laughter and love and community and comaraderie. Truly, it was as though I had landed in Heaven itself. It is my intention to once again be surrounded with like-minded people who treat each other equally without regard to appearance. I have been blessed to have this in the past, and appreciate that I will have it again soon. I appreciate that I will soon be able to express once again my purity of heart to someone, or to several people.

You can only Love someone into alignment - chastizing, criticizing, punishing - none of those work. And I am a Lover, not a Fighter - that is what I do, Love. That is what makes me happy. That is what makes me connected to the pure-hearted inner being that I AM. That is what I want to do and to be. And I want to be surrounded with those who will treat me with the same regard as they treat the most attractive, musclebound, physically beautiful person in their experience. Beauty is only skin-deep, as the parable goes.

My current experience of isolation is nothing more than a bouncing-off place to get me back to the place of wondrous love and interaction that was mine during the past two years. That's where I am most expansive, most alive, most connected to my inner, pure-hearted being. I give thanks for the contrast that I have now experienced since it is the springboard for me to jump into an even better, stronger, more loving, more interactive, more wondrous level of life that is waiting for me and for my loved ones. It is THIS picture of life that I align myself with now, knowing that it is here, present, waiting for me to find and enter into - the only thing keeping it from me, is me.