I opened YouTube and for some reason, there was a link to a clip called "Turtle has awesome orgasm."
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Well, listening to the sound and seeing the view of the turtle's vocal cords was just too much, and this led to much research, wherein I learned all about turtle reproduction.
Well, listening to the sound and seeing the view of the turtle's vocal cords was just too much, and this led to much research, wherein I learned all about turtle reproduction.
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Apparently, turtle penises inflate to a HUGE size once inside the female, which must come in handy, because there is basically nothing else that would prevent her from running off leaving the poor devil stranded.
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Aside from being showoffs, apparently, turtles will masturbate with anything that can be even remotely considered a sex toy.
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Apparently, turtle penises inflate to a HUGE size once inside the female, which must come in handy, because there is basically nothing else that would prevent her from running off leaving the poor devil stranded.
.
.
Aside from being showoffs, apparently, turtles will masturbate with anything that can be even remotely considered a sex toy.
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They particularly have a shoe fetish.
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But even pots and pans will do.
But even pots and pans will do.
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Don't forget sex with food...
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Patio table legs do just fine...
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I've heard of TALKING to brick walls...but...
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Younger male, older female...
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And what sex story would be complete without the gay element. Who says homosexuality is unnatural?
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I note that all the videos with females showed them to be COMPLETELY uninterested, and even resorting to grazing for food during the act...
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And I note that the poor males are the only creatures on the planet who are as limited as I am concerning motion and logistical challenges when it comes to assuming the position (effin back hardware!). How come I never knew any of this?
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