Recurring dream.

Awakened by a recurring dream. This seems to be a variation of a recurring dream that I had for 10 years, which spontaneously resolved. In that dream, I was graduating college, but discovered that I was missing a credit from high school. I was going to be forced to return to high school in my late 20's to obtain this credit.

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In the new dream, the circumstances change in that the location is not constant, and different people show up. But basically I am in school, approaching the end of a semester, I have not attended a required pass/fail class at all and am trying to figure out how to con my way into passing that one, I have not attended an English literature class and/or done the required reading, so there is no way I am going to pass the final, and I am basically clueless about how to proceed. There is anxiety, shame, a sense of failure, and an inability to reconcile why these required courses are impeding my progress. I am stuck in a time warp with no escape. Since I cannot pass these tests or obtain these credits, I am forever stuck.

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Last night's version had John Silver as the landlord showing up to check on me in my shack in the country in the Texas woods. The screen door had one of those old-timey latches where it looked like a bent nail hooked into an eyelet that was screwed into the door frame, and of course, you can just yank those right out. I was trying to fasten it for protection from something, but that was futile of course. An old coworker showed up, who has not lived in Texas for at least 10 years, like me, and I asked her what she was doing there, and she said she would explain if I had about 30 minutes to talk about it. I was trying to hide from people showing up.

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So this new dream is an unconscious visitation of repressed emotions of being inadequate, no-good, etc. There is a strong feeling of wanting to be left alone. I remember in this dream trying to get away from the telephone, but I had to remove an earpiece in order to shut it off.